Just relax? Try harder? Age is a woman’s issue? These are just a few of the myths that science has something to say about.

If you’ve experienced infertility, you may have received lots of unsolicited advice on how to conceive, including various herbal remedies and suggestions to “just reduce stress.”

You’re not alone — infertility is actually pretty common. About 1 in 6 adults globally are affected by infertility in their lifetime. Yet the advice they may hear is often unhelpful and sometimes just plain wrong.

To set the record straight, we’ve done the research to bust these myths about infertility.

While it’s true that relaxing could help with infertility caused by chronic stress or stress-related amenorrhea, infertility is not purely a psychological issue.

Infertility is a medical condition, and our reproductive health can’t be fixed by positive thinking or a new mindset alone. The most common cause is an issue with ovulation or sperm cells, but for 1 in 4 couples, a cause can’t even be identified.

That being said, those experiencing infertility are at a higher risk of depression, which can hinder further infertility treatment. So, while no scientific studies have found a direct correlation between stress and infertility, it never hurts to work on some relaxation techniques.

This myth generally only considers what happens between the sheets, but there’s a lot more to fertility than the actual sex part. Saying couples need to try harder can be demoralizing and, ultimately, not productive.

In 2021, 2.3% of all infants born in the United States were conceived through the use of infertility treatment, 99% of which was IVF.

There are many things we simply can’t control, and fertility falls into that category. Age, the type of treatment, the treatment center, and the number of treatment cycles all play a factor.

Effort doesn’t always directly translate to success.

Women are often the target of pregnancy topics, but it takes two to make a baby. Infertility affects men and women equally.

In fact, each sex has their own set of symptoms that may suggest infertility, such as testicle pain or a change in period flow.

“About half the time, there is male factor infertility, which can also overlap with female infertility. Plus, as partners, it is so important for both to be involved with the fertility process. Many of the male factors can be treated relatively easily,” said Dr. Barry Aron, an ABMS board certified OB-GYN.

While it’s true that women’s fertility decreases with age, women aren’t the only ones who experience fertility changes as they get older. Being doesn’t just affect women who are trying to get pregnant.

After the age of 40, men are likely to start experiencing decreases in semen volume and motility.

One 2020 study found that males are more likely to have decreased sperm motility by age 31, have lower sperm concentration levels by age 41, and are significantly more likely to present anomalies in semen volume, sperm concentration, and sperm DNA fragmentation by age 50.

“Also, men are more likely to develop erectile dysfunction as they age, which can cause challenges with vaginal intercourse,” notes Aron.

Even if a couple already has a child or children, they can experience difficulty in getting pregnant later. This is called secondary infertility. This refers to the inability to get pregnant for 12 months, after having a previous pregnancy at least once before. And after 6 months, if over 35.

The causes of secondary infertility include all the same ones as regular infertility. Many people turn to in vitro fertilization (IVF) in the case of secondary infertility.

In reality, one of the largest factors of fertility for men and women comes down to health.

Nutrition, being over- or underweight, exercising too little or too much, environmental and occupational exposure, substance and drug use and abuse, medications, and more, can all have an impact on fertility.

“Two healthy parents improve the success of fertility as well as the resulting pregnancy. It is best for men and women to adopt a healthy lifestyle before they even get pregnant, said Aron.

Work with a healthcare professional to determine what optimal health looks like for you.

Health tips

  • Maintain a healthy weight.
  • Take multivitamins.
  • Refrain from drugs and excessive alcohol use.
  • Avoid smoking.

Family planning around infertility comes down to personal choices. Every path looks different, and each individual choice is valid.

And don’t believe everything you hear out there. Evaluating your infertility is something you can work on with your doctor, and if a cause is found, treatment may be a viable option for you.