To embrace lagom, a Swedish philosophy of finding balance and moderation, focus on achieving “just the right amount” in all aspects of life.
While we don’t condone breaking into others’ homes, Goldilocks had the right idea when she tried to find things that fit her “juuust right.”
Lagom, pronounced “lah-gom,” roughly translated from Swedish, means “not too much, not too little.” Or “just right.” It’s about finding balance in all facets of life.
In a world filled with the warring messages “more is more” and “less is more,” it can be hard to know what’s enough for your comfort, from food portions, square footage, and what’s in your closet to who’s in your friend group or how full your calendar is.
Here’s how to find more balance and satisfaction by leaning into the Swedish philosophy of lagom.
Though it’s hard to boil down an entire way of life into a single phrase, “contentment in satisfaction” is another way of saying “just enough.” There’s a lot to be said for being content in the here and now with what you need to make you comfortable, no more, no less.
“Quality over quantity” is another phrase that fits into the lagom way of life. For example, reading three really amazing books is better than six not-so-great ones.
Kortney Yasenka and Karen Johnson Yasenka, authors of “Swedish Lagom: Finding Joy in Just Enough,” write, “Lagom is about finding enjoyment in the little things in life. It means embracing everything that nature has to offer while surrounding yourself with loved ones in a cozy environment.”
Mys and Fika are two other Swedish words that play a part in all of this.
Similar to the popular Danish concept of hygge, mys roughly translates from Swedish as a feeling of coziness, contentment, and well-being. Think: oversized pillows, candles, cozy mugs, decor made from natural elements, and soft blankets in neutral tones.
Fika is a Swedish tradition that combines coffee or tea with a light snack. But it’s not just a quick chance to swig down a coffee. It’s about taking time daily to relax, connect with others (or yourself), be in the moment, and enjoy your drink or snack with mindfulness. A chance to practice monotasking.
Whether at school, work, or home, people in Sweden stop what they’re doing to fika! It’s a way of practicing lagom each day.
In this world, we’re often made to feel like we’re doing too much or not enough of something (or don’t have enough of something) and then presented with products that are marketed toward those insecurities.
These stressful feelings of imbalance can lead to the “I’ll be happy when…” mindset, which can prevent us from enjoying the present moment.
Lagom is a way of living that mitigates that imbalance and can help you manage your time, energy, diet,
It’s also a way of spending your energy wisely. Living a lagom life means resting before you burn out, leaving the party before you feel completely overwhelmed and exhausted, and not pushing through an extreme workout to the point of injury.
Maintaining boundaries, tuning into your body to feel when it’s actually full or thirsty, and resting before you burn out are all examples of how you can apply lagom to your life.
It may also help to journal about what areas in your life feel out of balance or stressful. What can you release that you don’t really need? What can you not live without? What are some small glimmers of joy you could incorporate into your day-to-day?
While lagom is more than following a set of “life hacks,” here are a few tips:
- Work-life balance: Overall, Swedes are pretty good at taking breaks throughout the workday or school day. Swedish primary schools often have multiple shorter breaks instead of relying on one long recess. Work hard but take your PTO, if you have it. Take those coffee breaks. Take that morning or afternoon walk.
- Exercise and diet: In most cases, you don’t need fancy exercise equipment or clothing, or that expensive new diet trend. Those who practice lagom recognize that daily movement through things like walking or gardening is a fine way to get exercise.
- Social life: It’s common to feel pressure to fill your calendar with social activities, but if you’re tired or just need time to yourself, then staying home is A-OK. On the other hand, if your social calendar is a bit empty for your liking, then add to it — but only things that recharge you and bring you joy.
- Conscious consumption: Do you need the latest, newest, best whatever? Maybe. But probably not. Lagom does incorporate some aspects of minimalism and may be
considered sustainable , but it’s not about deprivation. It’s about keeping the things that are useful and necessary to you, and making room for what matters by letting go of things that don’t bring joy. - Creating or continuing traditions: Part of lagom is creating and maintaining whatever traditions are important to your culture, family, or self. These can help create a sense of belonging, connection, structure, and familiarity, which can all strengthen well-being. And not all traditions have to be for major holidays, maybe it’s the ritual of having that daily fika.
- Common kindness: This is common sense for most folks, but it’s important in lagom. If there are two cookies left, you’d take one and leave the other for someone else. If there’s only one left, you split it. Respecting personal space, being on time, and taking off your shoes indoors are other examples.
“Fear less, hope more;
eat less, chew more;
whine less, breathe more;
talk less, say more;
hate less, love more;
and all good things are yours.”
― Swedish proverb
While it’s not possible to live a perfectly balanced life, lagom invites you to find joy in “enough” and not chase extremes.
Work hard, but not too much. Enjoy time with friends, but don’t overdo it. Take those daily breaks to soak in the joy of small pleasures like coffee and pastries or the cozy atmosphere you’ve created in your home.
You may find that this mindset helps with emotional regulation and increases overall happiness and well-being, and that being more present helps reduce anxiety.